What Can You Do If Your Partner Seems Absent?

If it feels like your partner is absent, it could be due to many factors. However, it doesn’t always mean that the person no longer wants to be with you. We tell you more about this in this article.

“It seems my partner is absent.” What can I do?” This is perhaps one of the most common concerns among people in a relationship. Suddenly the other changes, things are no longer as they were and the fear of a hypothetical break appears.

How should you react in these cases? Because many feelings are involved, it often happens that doubts and questions appear that do not always have an immediate answer. Before you start working out any hypotheses, though, it’s best to explore some of the possible causes why this might have happened. Let’s take a closer look at this.

The bond of the couple

According to this research by Dr. Ortega Rojas (Spanish link) a couple’s bond is one of the most important bonds people build throughout their lives. Therefore, couples must establish harmony between the process of giving and receiving.

For love to work, several components affect the couple’s well-being. These revolve around mutual dedication and attention to each other’s needs.

At the same time, this research (Spanish link) by a team from the University of Santo Tomás (Chile) teaches us that to be happy in a relationship, it is important to have basic needs (food, money, clothes, etc.).

Also, shared entertainment activities and of course emotional satisfaction, intimacy and social support are also important. If these components fail, or if only one of the partners fulfills them, the relationship is prone to fail.

My partner seems absent from me: possible reasons

While it’s true that a change of attitude in your partner may seem like a sign that things are going wrong, it’s also true that you need to analyze other possible causes. Here are some.

Mature love is formed

This can happen after the infatuation phase. When this phase is over, the relationship calms down and everything calms down. This does not mean that love is over, but rather that it has moved into a more mature stage.

Your partner has suffered a loss

With every loss comes a grieving process. Your partner may have lost a loved one, their job, or something else important in their life and they are feeling deep sadness.

When this happens, it is normal for their attitude to change. It’s just that you, as a close partner, are the first to notice the changes. Try to give your partner all your love and understanding.

One of the two partners is fed up with so many unproductive arguments and chooses to keep their distance.

They feel pressured

Whether it’s because of study, work or the pressure of living together as a couple. In these cases, stress takes hold of the person and its consequences can be devastating to the relationship.

If you think this is what is happening to your partner, talk to him or her and ask your partner to express themselves without fear. Together, you can create guidelines for action and analyze how to improve or what to change.

Constant conflict

In these scenarios, it’s possible that one of the two partners is fed up with so many unproductive arguments and chooses to keep their distance. If this is the case, the partners will tend to distance themselves emotionally to avoid arguing.

Your partner is absent due to infidelity

This is another possible reason why the two of you feel distant from each other, as painful as it may be for you to admit it.

In some cases , the unfaithful partner changes his or her schedules and routines or begins to hide certain issues.

I feel my partner is absent: next steps

If, after analyzing these possible causes, you’ve found one that could describe your case, it’s time to move on to the next stage.

Talk to your partner: do it assertively, try to focus on the facts and not on what you believe. Tell your partner about the specific actions you have observed. Without trying to argue, ask directly why his or her attitude has changed.
Be patient: Avoid harassing your partner, either with constant messages, chasing, or by violating the boundaries of their privacy. If you do this, you are the one who resorts to unhealthy behavior or suffers from jealousy.
Show empathy: If you’ve already had a conversation and you’ve come to realize that your partner is going through a rough time, put yourself in his or her place and be understanding.

Don’t imitate your partner’s attitude: some people, who see their partner absent, adopt the same attitude, out of pride. However, this only makes the situation worse. Instead, it is more convenient to create habits to improve the relationship.
Have self-esteem: you need to develop a good sense of self. Often it may be that everything is in your imagination, that nothing is wrong, but that you have developed fears because of the forms of attachment you have. If this is the case, you should seek psychological support to reinforce your weaknesses.

Love yourself and don’t accept less than you deserve

If you are going through a rough patch in a relationship, the solution can only come from both of you. If you feel that the love and support is one-sided and that your partner isn’t reciprocating or making you happy, then you need to think about yourself first.

If you’ve talked to your partner and confessed your feelings, but your partner continues to do the same, it’s best to end the relationship. It is much better to be alone than in bad company.