In Love With A Married Man: Now What?

The love of your life is someone who gives you the stability and time you deserve. However, it is not uncommon among young women to fall in love with a married man. In this article we will discuss some factors that can have a major influence on this situation and how to get out of this situation.

It’s not always easy to control your heart. After all, your feelings play a major role in almost every situation. You usually can’t regain this control, but you can change your destiny if you go about your actions wisely.

Many women have had a crush on someone who is already taken. This happens when you feel very good being around him. This only becomes a problem when you lose control of your willpower, confidence, and freedom. 

Why am I in love with a married man?

There are several reasons why some women are attracted to a married man. Here are some reasons why you might have ended up in a relationship with a married man:

• Low self-esteem.  You feel emotionally discouraged and have little motivation. You see something “special” in someone who fills this void.
• Idealization. He has an attractive personality, is much older than you in many cases and has already achieved many great academic and social achievements. He is simply very successful.

• pity. Words like  ‘I am not understood’, ‘My marriage is a failure’ and ‘If I had met you before my wife, then…’  can cause a lot of pity. This may make you decide to give this “poor man” a little more joy in his life.
• Expectatitons. You don’t have a clear plan for your life. You get excited about all the projects he brings with him as he takes the time to get his life back in order.
• Loneliness. You want company. You may have children who have already moved out, financial stability and bad experiences that make you not want to get into a serious relationship.
• Personality. You feel an adrenaline rush for doing something you shouldn’t. You see this relationship as a kind of race in which you want to come first. The risks excite you.

The consequences

Being in love with a married man and accepting everything that comes with it can lead to nasty situations.

• You always come second. You live in the shadow of his social life and are not involved in the special moments in his life.
• Your time is wasted. You meet him, fall in love, listen to his many promises and then have to get over him. That’s a lot of time you’d be better off giving to someone else.

• Your friends and family will not readily accept your choice. This can leave you feeling lonely and isolated. This can lead to many tears and sleepless nights.
• When the truth comes out, you may lose the support of friends and family. In addition, this situation can give you a bad reputation.
• People will see you as a relationship wrecker if he eventually chooses you. Then when he becomes adulterous again, you will know how his other girlfriend feels. You were once in her situation.

In love with a married man: now what?

Suppose you fell in love with a married man. It is of course not possible to turn back time, but you can make sure that you do not waste even more of your time on this vicious circle.

Right now you are probably feeling a lot of frustration, anger, shame, emptiness, loneliness and isolation. How do you solve this?

• Think carefully about how you feel, where your life is heading and where you see yourself in five years. Is a relationship with a married man really what you want for yourself?
• Cut contact with this man and avoid places where you might encounter him. 
• Cry until you have no more tears left. Better to throw everything out now. Otherwise, you may bottle up these feelings and suffer from this situation for the rest of your life.

• Talk to friends. Your friends can offer you comfort and advice. After all, two know more than one. If possible, you can even try to seek professional help.
• Think about your personal goals and focus on new life projects. 
• Increase your circle of friends. For example, go to more social events and remember that there are more fish in the sea.

Love is meant to make us happier. However, being in love with a married man will not make you happier.